BACK


TW : Derealiztion / Depersonalization, blood, gore , weird , gross , disturbing warning for almost all of these Ig



5/3/21 | You're at the party
I was hanging out with my friends, and one of them asked if I wanted to go do a party later that day, and I agreed.
The next thing I can remember is getting out of my friend's truck, we had pulled up to a church and walked in. The building was huge and empty, and the intereor design was very pretty. It was kinda dark inside. There were mamy other people around having a good time.
I had slipped away and found a bathroom and locked myself inside. I felt really weird, gross and anxious. I hadn't really noticed what I was wearing until now, but a long pretty sea green blue dress, and dark heels. I've never worn anything like this in person so it was kinda weird, but I was comfortable with it.
I found myself looking in the mirror, I looked much more masculine than I do irl [though I didn't even notice this until I woke up and reflected on the dream lol, was just kinda like 'yeah, that's me' in the dream] . I was attempting to put on an emo look with makeup, but kept messing it up. I was having a lot of trouble moving my hands, it was concerning.
The mirror turned into a computer ( ? ) and I was trying to connect to the internet, but this was unsuccessful.
I hadn't realized how long I'd been in there until I got a video messege from a friend asking where I was and if I was alright.
I left the bathroom and went back out into the party. I don't remember anything else.


5/2/21 | 3D arcade
I was in an arcade, full of people, everything was low-poly 3D models and it looked extremely uncanny to me.
I remember seeing a girl with huge colorful punky hair doing hard drugs out in the open. Despite that I thought she looked cool as fuck haha.
I had been talking to some random dude for a long time, no idea what about.
We ended up playing DDR and... At this point things got kinda weird...... Everyone in the arcade was dancing, and as they were the arcade itself was fading out. So there were just a ton of uncanny 3D models dancing around in a void of colors.


4/25/21 | Dog attack again
I broke into some randos house looking for something, I don't remember what for. I chilled out in the basement for a while. I had assumed the poeple living there wouldn't be home for a while, but shortly would find that wasn't the case.
I exited the basement amd as I was leaving I encountered two people. Whoops.
They were only midlly confused why I has walked out of their basement, I explained I had been there the whole time, and they were okay with this, asking no questions.
Later I left the house and found myself in some field next to a stream of water, then I was attacked by dogs, again. This keeps happening : [


4/25/21 | Party store religion
The Local party store was selling Minecraft themed crucifixes, to promote a Minecraft event. I bought one.


4/24/21 | Movie in an industrial city
I was staying over at a friend's house, in some very industrial, gloomy city. Despite that the atmousphere was really cool. We mostly walked around there were a lot of neat areas we found.
Later we flmed a movie with some dude hlped us with the movie, he had red hair, and looked so dead (figuratively) his make-up was wicked though.
My friend's dad kept getting mad at me.


4/22/21 | I wish
I met my dad, but he was actually Sean Bonnette.


3/16/21 | HEart Horror games
I was playing a horror game. The game was dreary amd everything was lowpoly.
In it you walk around a poorly lit, worn down arcade that also doubles as an interactive playground. There's a mascot, who is a giant realistic heart with an uncanny smile on it's face, that wants you and the other kids in the arcade to participate in some fun activities around the interactive playground arcade thing.
I wanded away from the group, exploration is fun : D ! Outside of the playground arcade the building was mostly empty grey walls and floors
Inside of a small closet I had found a control panel, and a screen on the wall displaying the kids and the heat mascot. Yeahhhh I pressed the buttons on the control panel at random. It was messed up the playground arcade room real bad. I exited the closet and contined exploring.
Suddenly I hear, loudly " WHO'S BEEN MESSING WITH MY GAMES" in the worst silly voice.
and then
Chase ensues
The heart mascot is chasing me fullspeed, I ran up a flight of checkered stairs, that twists and turns and doesn't seem to end. There was a rush of anxiety as the heart mascot was chasing, I forgot I was playing a game in the dream.
The uncanny face on the heart mascot was all fucked and angry
Just before he caught me, I woke up.


3/15/21 | brand new moon
A new moon had entered the Earth's orbit, a lot of people were confusing it for a sun because of it's appearence.
I spent a lot of time studying this new moon.
I was hanging out with someone in my old apartment, we were discussing the new moon, but the person got mad at me.
Also ate a Christmas cookie that tasted like mint, ig it was Christmas again or somethin'


3/5/21 | Cartoons !
I was watching CN, a new show was airing ! It was in a style similar to the old She-Ra cartoon, but much more fluid
The character designs were interesting, iit was cool.
The show itself was a sci-fi superhero show that takes place in space.
There was a scientist lady working on an extremely important project, one that would determine if they liveed through whatever it was they were going through or not.
For some reason I was watching this all on an old CRT in the kitchen sink.


3/5/21 | oh sweet arsonist
A sketchy motherfucker was prowling around my house and trying to set it on fire.
I have no idea why, but I asked the dude what was up, and offered to let him join a party that had been going on in my backyard, and instead of the house, to start a fire in the firepit oh sweet arsonist.
He enjoyed the party and the fire from the firepit, dude called me kind for letting him join the party.
Eventually the backyard party morphed into a small furry convention, I was wearing a fursuit of my seamonster (OCHI).
It was cool for a second before turning into a huge freak disaster, idk what happened but everyone had to evacuate .


3/4/21 | Ambiguous dead thing
I had been around some ambiguous dead animal, and ended up getting a disease from it, I kept denying it but somebody told me they could tell I had the disease from looking at my teeth ( ? )


3/3/21 | OK
Was being eaten alive by something, but I couldn't tell what.

3/3/21 | walking dream ..... Christmas is March : D !
I was sailing for a while it was pitch black out, eventually making it to land, but I don't remember anything that happened inbetween.
The next thing I remember, I was walking in the middle of the street along a large bridge, decorated with colorul lights and strange Christmas decorations, and covered lightly with snow.
There were several other people also walking through the street, they were all wearing dresses. The cars on the street were driving slow and oddly. Some kinda parade was happening.
It was kinda blurry.
The next thing I can remember, I was walking on an empty dirt road surrounded by a dried up feild, with it being dark outside the atmousphere was extremely eerie.
I eventually made it into a township, it was busy. I noticed a girl talking with someone, it escalated into a loud argument, the other person was getting unreasonably angry, and called her some hurtful things before storming off. The girl saw me walk by, and decided to strike a conversation with me, freaked me out lol. She greeted me by my deadname and asked if I recognized her from school. I was really confused because she didn't look like anyone I've ever met before, but I guess my brain wanted to make the scenerio make sense, so I recognized her for some reason and was like "oh yeah ...." .
She told me she was headed up to a party amd asked if I wanted to tag along, I agreed, it sounded fun.
The next thing I remember is that we were inside the front room of a building. The building looked like my grandmas old house.
The room gradually formed into something different the walls were now a dark red, and there was a large foggy window, the room was drab and lights shone through, a peaceful combination.
Yeah it didn't seem like a party at all hahaha
We stood there and talked for a while about whatever.
Since the windows were foggy I drew a bunny in it, the girl with me also drew with me, she drew a cat next to the rabbit I made, and finished it off by drawing a heart over the two creature, it was cute ^ __ ^
She asked me where I came from, and I told her I sailed here.
I don't remember much else, but I had to leave because it was getting late, she told me she'd see me again. (? )
Overall a really peaceful good dreams, good vibes


2/3/21 | Red Sky
I was biking to some park with someone a few towns over and I specifically remmeber going through some long overpass. After leaving the tunnel the person said biking to this park wasn't important and we should leave before it gets bad out. But for some reason it was really urgent to me. The person was right though and the clouds and sky got really dark, the moon and stars were visible and red. It was kinda wacked but pretty. We ended up going to some very small square building.


2/2/21 | Who are you
I could see myself in third person. I was laying in my bed and there was a person besides me talking to me. I don't remember the conversation but I was really pissed off and annoyed and wanted them to leave.


2/1/21 | Youtube
I saw a friend I hadn't seen in a while, and he told me how he had gotten into making youtube videos. We watched all of the videos he made, most of them were skits of him and his friends running around the woods, and skateboarding videos. It was a fun dream.


1/31/21 | Music + Gamestop pop
I had a dream that my music got really popular and people hated it.
I also has a dream that I went to Gamestop with someone and we baught a gross amount of pop. Before leaving the other person I was with was talking to someone else in the parking lot. I put the several cases in the car and joined them. While we were talking with the other people a group of toddlers stole like 2 large boxes of Pepsi and Mountain Dew from the car.
Also something interesting about the setting. The parking lot and Gamestop were the only thing there. The area surrounding it was a weord nothingness.


1/30/21 | Slice of life Gastation Tales
tw // Injury , dog attack , seizure
This dream felt really real, I didn't know I was dreaming.
On the first day (That I can remember of the dream) It was dark out and there was no snow, I was walking to a nearby gas station. I took a different route than I usually do because, I just knew the usual path I took had violent dogs somewhere along it. The trip went well.
The next night my mom wanted me to go with her to the sam gas station, by car. For some reason on the way she pulled into a driveway of a house that had been totally destroyed. I don't know why, but we both opened the doors and were quickly ambushed by a bunch of large dogs, they started attacking us. The barking was really overwhelming. I tried to push the dogs away, and one of them bit down on my leg, and wouldn't let go.
I almost called someone for help but decided against it, I'm not sure why. We were able to push the dogs out and drive out of there though. The only injury was my leg.
Now it was light out, the sky a deep orange. We still went to the gas station, but just to get medical supplies to treat the wound on my leg, it was bloody and gross but didn't hurt at this point and I was able to walk fine. We got back to the car and I cleaned the wound and wrapped it up.
We went back home and I just hung out with my brother's friends. One of them ended up having a seizure, but he was okay.
The next day I met up with a friend I havn't seen in a while, and we hung out for the day. We walked around and talked for a while, eventually the next thing I remember we were at some fancy building, some kinda school. We went into a strange room, and people told us we weren't aloud in there because we didn't go to the school, but we ignored them and did it anyways.
The room was weird, there weren't any distinguishable walls, it was all smooth, like gemstone. It was mixtures of different shades of blues and teal. There was music playing, and it was raining inside the room. My friend and I just sat in there and talked for a while it was chill. We caught up with eachother and I showed her my gnarly leg.
We went back to my house to hang out with my brother and his friends.
Chill dream week.
After the last day there was nothing, and I woke up from the dream totally forgetting I existed in a human body, and was kinda like... Shocked about it (It's a really weird uncomfortable feeling tbh).


1/27/21 | Garfield Cards
Maybe it should be concerning how often I dream about Garfield lmao.
I had a bunch of Garfield trading cards, but they were all the same exact card. So I had hundreds of these cards I didn't even like. I ended up trading them all for a ton of quarters but then I didn't know what I was gonna do with the new abundence of quarters I had.


1/26/21 | Bug Fish !!
I went fishing and instead of fish I was catching abnormally large insects.
Later in the dream I was slightly younger and I had met my dad for the first time and it was really weird.


1/17/21 | Garfield and alcalholism
I was at a second hand store and found a bunch of garfield merch, I didn't have any money though. Then I was at home and decided to drink a ton of liqur I had gotten from someone. My mom got mad at me for it :(


1/15/21 | Cylander grass cabe and a machine that hates me
Tw // Death
I don't remember much from this dream but it was really bizarre.
In this dream I gues I was able to view any point in time any where on Earth from a kinda omniscent perspective.
I was in a grassy tunnel, this was sort of the starting point. the cave was a cylander completely covered in moss and other plant life. Exiting the end of the cave would let me view a new sitation.
I remember one of the places I ended up in was an empty green glassland, a lot of hills and barely any trees, it was really nice out. A lot of cats appeared suddenly, covering the empty land.
The next thing I remember I was back in the tunnel, there was a guy with me. I don't remember what he looked like other than he was wearing a cloak. We talked about stuff that I can't recall.
The setting changed, everything was greyscaled, with a blue tint to it. I was watching from an omniscent perspective. The room was a cluttered living room and a lady was on the couch giving birth. There were a ton of doctors surrounding her. She ended up dying, the doctors tried to bring her back with some weird machine but it didn't work.
After I saw that I was back in the cave, it was kind of shocking. I somehow knew this woman was the cloak dude's mother and all I could say was something like "Damn, I saw your mom die giving birth to you" and we continued talking.
The next vision I had was of bigfoot, still omniscent and greyscale. They were just walking through some trees, the perspective was really strange.
There's a gap in memory but the next thing I can remember I was in what appeared to be a kidergarten classroom. The lights were out, the floor in the pattern of those colorful foam playmats, and the room was completely empty except for a bunch of retro looking computers and machines. The dark room illuminated by the screens.
One of the monitors had a cartoony text face floating around a spacey background on the screen. The face on the screen started talking to me. It was upset that I was there, I wasn't supposed to be there. It was ranting about how I had fucked something up with the machines.
Next thing I know I'm in a space void fac-to-face with the textface dude. I didn't have a body or anything but I was just kinda there. I had a lengthy comversation with them that I can't remember before I woke up.


10/31/2020 | Acid
TW: Drugs
I was with some people in the woods and also in a car and they eventually offered me weird looking Acid, the tabs were like blue and sparkly idk it's blurry .


10/26/2020 | Cat Apartment
I had a dream I was in some apartment building with huge windows, it was night, the lights in the room were off, bright lights from outside shined through the windows . The room was also empty + grossly minimalistic. It was full of cats too. For some reason the dream felt strange and scary


10/9/20 | Shopping
TW : Claustrophobia
I was at a store, The entire shop was nearly empty, there were no people and few items on the shelves. The setting was eerie, and felt off, mostly yellow orange colors with dark lighting. The shelves looked more like bookshelves than store shelves.

There were some synth keyboards in one of the isles, and bins full of Garfield stuffed animals. While looking at this stuff the shelves were closing in on me, I wasn't concerned about it.


9/22/27 | Computer Virus
TW : Computer virus , suicide (word)
I wanted to show someone something on my laptop, but opened it to find the desktop with littered in random image files of people with their face censored out, each image had 'suicide' in the file name. The background was also changed to one of these images. I recognized this as a virus.

I deleted all of the image files, and the computer background changed to that one windows XP background (y'know the one). For some reason I got up and starting looking through a file cabinet, and was concerned because I found a lot of stuff was missing. (?)

I went back to my laptop and checked out the task manager and there were a ton of random programs I've never heard of running (Most looked like games). I could somehow delete the applications from here. Cool. When I attempted to delete one of them the game opened, so I closed it, but no matter what I did it just kept opening. I reset my computer and quickly wiped all of the suspicious stuff from it.


9/22/20 | Donkey Kong 64 but it's fucked up + weed
TW : Drugs
I was playing what I thought in the dream was Donkey Kong 64, the game was a 3D platformer and everything was detailed really. . . Weirdly I guess. Everything was dark, and I saw from the perspective of the DK rather than me (if that makes sense). I was in some swamp area and there were aligators and a lot of trees. The game was nothing like DK 64 but my brain thought it was idk.

I also remember smoking weed with a friend in a comfy attic space, to celebrate their birthday. Wild.


9/18/20 | Paper
I was sitting in an alleyway, near a busy street. My hair was made of paper, and I was cutting out paper to make more hair strands. That's it.


9/12/20 | Stalked, also there's a cool dude, and I get tiny ?
TW: Stalking , Cops , guns
I was in my living room with some other people, the room looked different than it does IRL. It seemed larger, emptier, and there was a big window behind the TV that streched along the entire wall. It was night outside and the lights were off, the room was lit by the glow of the TV. There wasn't anything on the TV, it was just a white screen for some reason.
I was sitting on the couch, using my laptop, I was doing something ... ? Maybe it was important lol, I think the screen was also blank like the TV. The other people in the room were talking, I was drowning them out.
I noticed that there were people outside the window just looking in, watching. They were cops. This obviously freaked me out, I stared at them for a while before actually telling the other people in the room with me.
We all quietly went to another room away from the window. I abandonded my laptop in the living room.
For some reason I went back there to find that my laptop had moved and the charger had been cut. I opened the computer to find that it was locked because someone had tried to get into it, but failed. I was on edge now.
The other half of the computer's charger had led to the door, which was slightly open. I walked over to it. There was a cop on the other side, he burst through, and had a gun pointed at me. He shot it but there were no bullets, instead there were small, glowing, particles. They hit me and it stung really bad.
I ran off and hid in the bathroom.

The next thing I can remember is I was in the living room again, it was day now and I was chilling with this dude, he was making things out of clay.I was having fun just watching him make stuff, it was sweet : )
Then I got rlly small ? - I don't know why, but it was weird seeing stuff at this perspective. The dude then made a tiny clay chair for me to sit in, thoughtful.


9/11/20 | Fish
I opened the fridge to find that it was completely empty except for a pile of fish.


9/8/20 | Water
TW: Contaminated water , hazmat suit ,
I was watching a VHS recording of someone in my house doing tests on the water. They found that it had been contaminated. Then the video cut to a pure white room, there was a white table with a bunch of science equipment layed about. A person wearing a hazmat suit walked into frame and stopped behind the table. They began doing a demonstation to show what was wrong with the water, it was thick and had a slight purple tint. They then expained the reason it was like this was because of something that happened in the 60's was finally setting in, and contaminating water in a strange way around the area. The person listed the dangers of drinking the water, and the video ended with a warning.

After watching the video I went to the kitchen sink, got myself a glass of water, and drank it.


9/7/20 | Disease
TW : Really gross disease
I don't really remember much from this dream except having a disease in the back of my throat, the flesh had turned grey and felt uncomfortable. I spent a lot of time examining it in the mirror. I also remember browsing the internet.


9/4/20 | crisis egg & I become an angry rabbit
Had a dream that I was making scrambled eggs, there were other ppl with me. The egg was sentient and had curled up, and, went on a tangent about how sad it was, I could somehow understand. The other ppl with me asked me what it was saying and I didn't answer. I kept poking the eggs with a fork.

In another dream I was walking down the street with a stranger, that I felt a deep sense of hatred for. So I let the person know how much I hated them, and kept throwing around angry threats. We continued walking together.
No memories in between- We were in a field now, still walking, I was still upset. In the middle of the field there were a bunch of rabbits in these small cage-like houses, weird little rabbit town. The rabbits were big.
A fox had appeared from seemingly nowhere and attempted to kill the rabbits, but the rabbits faught back-Going for the fox's throat, killing the fox instead. The stranger I was with told me it was my fault that this happened.
Then I became one of the rabbits.